Funny Quotes

There was a lady at Santarem--but my lips are sealed. It is the part of a gallant man to say nothing, though he may indicate that he could say a great deal. ~ The Crime of The Brigadier by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle "A man can well afford to be as bold as brass, my good fellow, when he gets gold in exchange!" ~ Martin Chuzzlewit by Charles Dickens "Rich folks may ride on camels, but it an't so easy for 'em to see out of a needle's eye. That is my comfort, and I hope I knows it." ~ Martin Chuzzlewit by Charles Dickens "Think! I've got enough to do, and little enough to get for it, without thinking." ~ Bleak House by Charles Dickens "Mr. Bazzard's father, being a Norfolk farmer, would have furiously laid about him with a flail, a pitch-fork, and every agricultural implement available for assaulting purposes, on the slightest hint of his son's having written a play." ~ The Mystery of Edwin Drood by Charles Dickens But Rosa soon made the discovery that Miss Twinkleton didn't read fairly. She cut the love-scenes, interpolated passages in praise of female celibacy, and was guilty of other glaring pious frauds. ~ The Mystery of Edwin Drood by Charles Dickens There are two insults which no human being will endure: the assertion that he hasn't a sense of humor, and the doubly impertinent assertion that he has never known trouble. ~ Main Street by Sinclair Lewis "There are two races of people, only two, and they live side by side. His calls mine 'neurotic'; mine calls his 'stupid'." ~ Main Street by Sinclair Lewis "My idea of an agreeable person," said Hugo Bohun, "is a person who agrees with me." ~ Lothair by Benjamin Disraeli Indeed, he would sometimes remark, when a man fell into his anecdotage, it was a sign for him to retire from the world. ~ Lothair by Benjamin Disraeli