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Two Insults
There are two insults which no human being will endure:

There are two insults which no human being will endure . . .

Zuleika Dobson by Sir Max Beerbohm
Zuleika Dobson by Sir Max Beerbohm

The dullard’s envy of brilliant men is always assuaged by the suspicion that they will come to a bad end. ~ Sir Max Beerbohm

William Congreve Quote
The Old Bachelor by William Congreve

“I find we are growing serious, and then we are in great danger of being dull.” ~ The Old Bachelor by William Congreve

298 Funny Quotes from Literature

Funny Quotes

The sense of humor dies hard. ~ Personality Plus by Edna Ferber "Old men only lie in wait for people to ask them to talk. Then they rattle on like a rusty elevator wheezing up a shaft." ~ Dandelion Wine by Ray Bradbury The first thing you learn in life is you're a fool. The last thing you learn in life is you're the same fool. ~ Dandelion Wine by Ray Bradbury Mistrust all enterprises that require new clothes. ~ A Room With A View by E. M. Forster "To win back my youth, Gerald, there is nothing I wouldn't do—except take exercise, get up early, or be a useful member of the community." ~ A Woman of No Importance by Oscar Wilde When one wants to be natural, of necessity one becomes the reverse of natural. ~ Phineas Redux by Anthony Trollope A bull in a china shop is not a useful animal, nor is he ornamental, but there can be no doubt of his energy. ~ Phineas Redux by Anthony Trollope It is the necessary nature of a political party in this country to avoid, as long as it can be avoided, the consideration of any question which involves a great change. ~ Phineas Redux by Anthony Trollope "Prophecy is like a half-trained mule," he complained to Jorah Mormont. "It looks as though it might be useful, but the moment you trust in it, it kicks you in the head." ~ A Dance with Dragons by George R. R. Martin "I sadly want a reform in the construction of children. Nature's only idea seems to be to make them machines for the production of incessant noise." ~ The Woman in White by Wilkie Collins

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