Humorous Quotes

In the majority of cases, conscience is an elastic and very flexible article. ~ The Old Curiosity Shop by Charles Dickens Over and over again in my past experience among my perishing fellow-creatures, the members of the notoriously infidel profession of Medicine had stepped between me and my mission of mercy—on the miserable pretence that the patient wanted quiet, and that the disturbing influence of all others which they most dreaded, was the influence of Miss Clack and her Books. ~ The Moonstone by Wilkie Collins It is one of my rules in life, never to notice what I don't understand. ~ The Moonstone by Wilkie Collins "You might have married him not because you loved him, but because you didn't love anybody else. When one is young, one marries out of mere curiosity, just to see what it's like." ~ The Philanderer by George Bernard Shaw "The fickleness of women I love is only equaled by the infernal constancy of the women who love me." ~ The Philanderer by George Bernard Shaw Apology? Bah! Disgusting! Cowardly! Beneath the dignity of any gentleman, however wrong he might be. ~ I Will Repay by Baroness Emmuska Orczy "I find we are growing serious, and then we are in great danger of being dull." ~ The Old Bachelor by William Congreve They say that faint heart never won fair lady; and it is amazing to me how fair ladies are won, so faint are often men's hearts! ~ The Warden by Anthony Trollope The bishop did not whistle: we believe that they lose the power of doing so on being consecrated. ~ The Warden by Anthony Trollope He does love prophesying a misfortune, does the average British ghost. Send him out to prognosticate trouble to somebody, and he is happy. ~ Told After Supper by Jerome K. Jerome